BCIFV home > Media Releases > February 2, 2000

For Immediate Release
Contact: Penny Bain, ED, BCIFV, (604) 669-7055
February 2, 2000

Opinion:

Could Starbucks Tragedy Have Been Prevented?

Key to preventing spousal homicide is
getting everyone on board in efforts to understand and respond to it

by Penny Bain and Lynne Melcombe,
BC Institute Against Family Violence

No one can say whether the murder of Starbucks manager Anthony McNaughton could have been prevented. But at the BC Institute Against Family Violence, we believe understanding family violence is the key to prevention.

According to Statistics Canada, half of all female murder victims are killed by family members and three times as many women as men are killed by current or former intimate partners. One-quarter or more of spousal homicides of females occur following relationship separation; killing a spouse following separation is a primarily male phenomenon. Almost half of all spousal homicides of women lack a history of spousal violence. The intended victim of spousal homicide is often not the only victim.

Several of these points are significant to the murder of devout Buddhist Anthony McNaughton. The last is important for obvious reasons.

The second-last is also pertinent. Although the intended victim had spoken with police about her estranged husband, a restraining order was not recommended because there had been no violence. Yet a 1994 BCIFV study by Mary Cooper revealed that relationships that end in post-separation homicide do not always involve prior assault. They may have been marked by the male's possessiveness, jealousy, or verbal abuse, but the murder attempt was the first act of physical violence.

But it's in understanding the way some men react to separation that some spousal homicides might be prevented. Cooper and others concluded that:

• men are at greater risk than women of experiencing first-onset major depression following separation.
• women are more likely to experience depression prior to separation, while men tend to become depressed afterward.
• one-third of those who kill following separation commit suicide; another third require psychiatric services, such as treatment for severe depression; and most perpetrators in both groups are male.

Some studies have suggested that men are more profoundly affected by separation because the psychological advantages of marriage are greater for men, Cooper wrote. In particular, men whose childhood experiences did not nurture emotional confidence may be emotionally dependent on female partners, yet have difficulty accepting this and display controlling behaviour to mask it.

This contention was supported by the BCIFV study, in which most of the men who killed following separation were chronically jealous, yet ambivalent about their dependency. About half were wife batterers; the other half were "merely" jealous and possessive. Several displayed continuing possessiveness after the relationship ended by stalking their former partners.

In other words, while a history of spousal assault warned of the potential for mortal danger, absence of such a history did not indicate that danger did not exist. In fact, the key to prevention emerging from the BCIFV study appeared to lie less in the presence or absence of overt violence than in the psychological state underlying either physically violent or emotionally obsessive behaviour.

"In thinking about what needs to change to prevent some of these murders, it is ironic that what comes to mind is the need to emancipate men with a high need for control from their pathological dependence on their partners," Cooper wrote. "Women's 'liberation' was a major societal force for many years, but to a certain extent what was and still is needed for many women is economic emancipation, rather than emotional freedom. The liberation that men similar to these perpetrators seem to need is from their narcissistic dependence on their partner, from their feelings of inadequacy to function without the familiar."

That was 1994. A lot has changed. The Vancouver Police Department now includes a criminal-harassment unit. Officers are trained in domestic-violence intervention. Protocols recommended by experts were followed when the intended Starbucks victim first went to the police.

It may be tempting at this juncture to say, "We've done everything we can do." But that would be no more true now than it was in 1994.

One might think this would be an opening to launch into renewed criticism of the police. And the police may have things to learn from this murder.

But the buck cannot stop there. It is not the job of the police to reshape behaviours that are deeply rooted in our culture.

It's not their job to teach boys that emotional independence comes from learning to express and deal with all their emotions. Or to convince adults to devote as many resources as necessary to ending family violence. Or to help all of us appreciate that certain life events can be sufficiently devastating for some of us to lead to far-reaching consequences for others.

"It would seem that men need to be encouraged from an early age to be able to look after themselves and to understand that confidence in that ability will allow them the freedom to be interdependent," Cooper wrote. "There needs to be a greater public understanding of the impact a separation can have . Perhaps we need not only courses and counselling to help us maintain or mend a relationship but also to help us end one."

Researchers now understand family violence better than ever. Police are better trained than ever to respond to it. And some individuals - notably brother, son, and friend Anthony McNaughton - are readier than ever to pay the price of defending a life.

But what about the rest of us? What about those who are more concerned about reducing taxes than reducing family violence? Or those who see child rearing as the burden of those who bear children rather than a collective responsibility with collective benefits? Or those who dismiss individuals in distress as whiners instead of seeing that extending a hand to them helps us all?

Only when these people join in our efforts to end family violence will we stand a chance of doing so. Only when we adequately fund those who research and respond to family violence will we take strides toward creating a safe society. Only when we have done these things will we have honoured all victims of family violence and paid due respect to Anthony McNaughton, hero.

For more information, please contact Penny Bain, Executive Director of the BC Institute Against Family Violence, at (604) 669-7055 or visit our website at www.bcifv.org.