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An Immigration Problem? Battered Chinese Women in British Columbia

The Symptoms

According to the 1995 statistics supplied by the Vancouver-based agency, SUCCESS, the number of Chinese husbands referred by probation officers to their anger management program climbed from 5 in 1994 to 11 in 1995. This represents a more than double increase. The figure is expected to reach at least 15 in 1996. SUCCESS is the only organization in B.C. that provides anger management to Chinese-speaking batterers, and is also a major counselling service provider for battered Chinese women.

Of the total 20 cases received by the Family and Youth Division of SUCCESS since the latter half of 1993, 12 Chinese men come from China and 5 from Hong Kong. Twelve of them fall between the age of 35-50 years old, 14 have resided in Canada for over 5 years and 8 of them have married for more than a decade (Table 1).

Frances Lui, Chinese counsellor with the Greater Vancouver and Lower Mainland Multicultural Family Support Services Society, says their number of battered Chinese women clients has also climbed over the last few years, with a greater percentage of women from China. The Society provides specialized counselling for battered wives.

Kelly Ng, director with SUCCESS's Family and Youth Division, says the number of Chinese women who had experienced a certain degree of battering and sought counselling from SUCCESS rose from about 30 in previous years to over 40 in 1994/95. These figures do not include those cases which later report under the category of "spousal assault" during the course of counselling.

Table 1: Male batterers counselled by SUCCESS
Number of clients
1993 (latter half)	4
1994	5
1995	11
Country of origin of the batterers
China	12
Hong Kong	5
South East Asia	3
Age of the batterers
26-35	5
35-50	12
over 51	3
Duration in Canada
over 5 years	14
3-5 years	3
less than 3 years	3
Married for
over 10 years	8
5-10 years	6
3-5 years	2
1/2 - 3 years	2
less than 1/2 year	2

Although official statistics are not available, former Minister of Women's Equality, Penny Priddy says approximately one in ten or one in twelve Chinese women in B.C. have experienced spousal assault. The figure seems to be a little below the general provincial average, but because of cultural and language barriers, Priddy believes the reporting is 50% lower among Chinese women than non-Chinese.

The Reasons

Immigration. All counsellors contacted for this research point to immigration as a major contributing factor for wife battering among the Chinese. They say the pressure from immigrating to a new country is the root of many family violence cases.

SUCCESS counsellor Betty Wong says immigrant women find it easier getting a job than their husbands. Financial problems are the major concern for many new immigrant families. It's usually not easy for immigrant men to find a job as good and as high-paid as the one they had in their country of origin, mainly because of the language problem or the differences in evaluating qualifications in the two countries. Many Chinese men, especially, are professionals or successful businessmen before they emigrate. They are unwilling to take up lower-paying or lower-ranking jobs when they move to Canada. Wong says women experience less of a psychological burden and sense of loss of dignity than men when it comes to job searching. Immigrant women are willing to do any job if they know they have to support their children and the family. Many women become the breadwinner of the household instead of the men, and the reverse of traditional sex roles is a situation in itself potentially dangerous.

Kelly Ng says the self-esteem problem is prevalent among immigrant Chinese men who are forced to live with an unsatisfactory job. Apart from broken self-esteem, they tend to imagine that their wives are also looking down on them. As a result they project all their grievances on to their wives and target them as the root of the many family problems.

Another counsellor from SUCCESS, David Ho, explains why immigrant women can get a job more easily. He says B.C.'s economy is built on consumption, which has created a large number of service and reception positions, and women have a better chance in getting jobs of these nature.

China vs Hong Kong

Why does SUCCESS receive more cases of assaultive men from mainland China than from Hong Kong? David Ho says the problems of men from China are more complex. Some male clients referred to SUCCESS are immigrants sponsored by their wives. Many of them live in their wives' houses with their in-laws. The psychology of "relying on the women" makes these men feel inferior.

Moreover, Ho says many men from China have experienced hardships under the communist rule. Their wish to begin a new and better chapter of life in Canada is very strong. But very often the language problem and the big cultural gap prevent them from leading the "dream life" they have in mind. All of these factors contribute to a stressful life, which eventually precipitates more uncontrolled behaviours.

On the other hand, Ho says the problems with the male clients from Hong Kong are more related to sex roles. Ho points out that these men usually have great career achievements in Hong Kong. Failing to find a job in Canada and having their wives working adds more pressure to these men. Some may want to return to Hong Kong to resume their career there. But if they cannot leave their Canadian homes for some reason, Ho says, they will be psychologically trapped in a cul-de-sac with nowhere to go at either end. Ho describes this situation as a precipitating factor to violence.

Chinese Tradition

David Ho says "harmony and stability" constitute the backbone of Chinese culture. In the familial context, the belief that "men deal with the external and women the internal affairs" has been a deep-rooted understanding of all Chinese. The role of wives is to cultivate a harmonic and stable atmosphere within the home. Traditionally, Chinese men do not beat their wives, but love and protect them. However, if the harmonic atmosphere is unattainable, a man as the master of the family will become very angry and will do anything to try to "restore" the harmony.

Ho says the Chinese are a pragmatic people who focus their attention on lifestyle and achievements. Rather less versed are they in the importance of dealing with emotions and psychological problems. The Chinese language has much fewer words than English for describing emotion-related behaviours. In schools, children are not taught to handle emotions. Ho says both Chinese men and women are less trained to relieve their grievances or anguish.

How Does She Feel?

Francis Lui, Chinese counsellor with the Vancouver & Lower Mainland Multicultural Family Support Services Society, says it's common for battered women to feel helpless, frightened and sad. They are also uncertain about their life ahead. Though unhappy with their violent relationships, many are hesitant to leave their abusive homes.

Over 90% of the battered Chinese wives who seek help from SUCCESS come to look for means to save their marriages, Betty Wong says. Wong states that some Chinese women are traditional; they would rather try their best to keep the family in shape than choose divorce as a way to relieve their pain.

Angie (not her real name) remembered that she felt when her husband first beat her.

"I was so shocked and frightened. What made him do this? Why? We both were mad...none of us knew what to do... But I forgave him and told myself 'I should give him a chance." Angie says.

Angie came from China and was an immigrant sponsored by her husband, who immigrated to Canada five years before Angie did. Soon after Angie landed in Vancouver with their 11-year old daughter, she found that her husband was going out with a Canadian girlfriend. He told Angie it's "legitimate" to keep a mistress in Canada.

And he kept on beating her. Angie had thought of calling the police. She didn't because she did not want to scare her daughter. She was also afraid of losing her immigrant status if she got divorced. It was not until she was bitterly beaten that Angie made up her mind. She went for help and moved into a transition house with the child, where she felt safe and honoured.

What Does He Think?

SUCCESS anger management counsellor David Ho says the men who are new to the program usually do not admit to their abusiveness, saying that they don't mean to beat their wives. Very often they would argue that the Canadian justice system doesn't understand Chinese culture, that a minute familial dispute is overcoloured to be seen as an abuse. They also blame the Canadian policy for "over-protecting" the rights of women so that men's rights are ignored.

Ho says the Chinese are used to treating spousal disputes as family matters that should only be dealt with by the two involved. Chinese batterers still cling to the centuries old notion that "husbands and wives can come to peace right after they fight", and "shameful family matters should be contained within the house".

Therefore many batterers under counselling do not admit to being violent, nor can they accept the reasons for which they are charged. Ho says his clients must go through at least two to three counselling sessions before they begin to realize what they've done to their wives.

Among the cases handled by Ho, many couples began with quarreling, which gradually ended in battering. Neither side would be aware of his/her own aroused emotions when they quarreled, nor would they think of seeking counseling or finding somebody to talk to about their frustrations, which later transformed into bodily attacks.

Ho says that some Chinese batterers would unconsciously judge their wives behaviour on a moral basis. For instance, these men would say: "She's wrong, she should be beaten!" Ho says they would seldom analyze the problem by reasoning, such as: "Is our problem the result of tension brought by immigration?"

"Batterers are also real victims," Tom (not his real name) sighs.

"I told the judge : 'The Canadian laws that protect women are so different from what the traditional Chinese believes, but I'll try to learn the Canadian way of life." Tom remembers he said when he went through the hearing where he was charged for assault.

"Now I understand that in Canada even if your wives make up a story, we still have to keep smiling, keep silent, and walk away like a dog." Tom smiles.

Tom feels his rights as a husband are shattered. He hopes so much that the Chinese community in Canada can establish a centre for "victimized" husbands, which tells Chinese men about the Canadian rules, what the men's rights are, as well as things they can do if they are charged for wife battering.

Conclusion

Although there are culture-specific reasons for battering wives, all counsellors emphasize that abusive behaviour has a common denominator in all cultures: the macho stereotype. The macho burden has been borne by men for so many centuries that it is not easy to remove. The belief that women should conform to men's macho stereotype provides a good reason for men to justify their abusive behaviour.

Susanna Ng.
Susanna Ng is a journalist with Ming Pao newspaper in Vancouver.