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Archives > Winter 1999 articles
"Milestones to Happiness" Support Groups for Abused Older
Women
In March of 1995, a study was undertaken by a student from
the University of Victoria in the Maple Ridge-Pitt Meadows
area on the prevalence of senior abuse within those communities.
Unfortunately, as one might expect, the study confirmed that
abuse of older persons was indeed occurring, and that physical
abuse and financial abuse were the most commonly experienced
varieties of this problem.
In October of 1997, Cythera Transition House Society contacted
the BC Coalition to Eliminate Abuse of Seniors (BCCEAS) to
consider collaborating on the creation of a support group
for abused senior women. A funding proposal was submitted
by the Society and granted by the United Way to initiate the
support group as a pilot project. The partners in this joint
venture were Cythera Transition House Society, Maple Ridge-Pitt
Meadows Community Services Council - Seniors Outreach and
BCCEAS. In February of 1998, the program was promoted to community
organizations and highlighted in the local papers. Even before
the group was advertised, seniors had learned about it by
"word of mouth" and four senior women, ranging in
age from 70-85, had signed up. As the group began, seven women
were in attendance.
The purpose of the group was to provide positive growth opportunities
for older women who have experienced or continue to experience
abuse and/or violence in their relationships by helping participants:
- work toward gaining an understanding of their life experiences
- recognize the cycle of abuse and develop a personal growth
plan which would establish self-protection and support systems,
and enable the woman to
- experience wellness in the context of her individual
and family life.
Joyce Perrin was hired as the Program Coordinator and Facilitator
for "Milestones to Happiness". A senior herself
who works as a grief and loss counsellor, Joyce possesses
a lifetime of skills, experience and expertise. During the
twenty week program, the participants shared their personal
stories with each other, viewed videos on abuse and discussed
the issues both with the facilitator and/or visiting speakers.
The curriculum also included coverage of topics such as grief
and loss, depression, self-esteem, assertiveness, and how
to access appropriate community resources. Group outings and
lunch visits at participants' homes rounded out the activities
enjoyed by all. Each week the women obtained strength from
sharing poems, writings or readings with one another which
fostered their well-being. These sharing sessions, suggested
by the group members themselves, were soon added to the weekly
program.
"Milestones to Happiness" was an extremely successful
project. In the words of one of the senior women participants:
"When I joined the group, I was in an awful depression
and crying all the time. It was great to be able to talk to
other women who were going through the same kind of things
and feelings as I was. We went for lunches at each other's
place and it was great as I had never been allowed to go out
with women for lunch before in my life. The videos we watched
brought back a lot of bad memories, but I know I don't have
to worry about that anymore. The guest speakers who came to
speak to us were really good and helped to answer a lot of
my questions. It sure has made me a happier person. I am volunteering
at Cythera's thrift store two days a week now and it gives
me confidence. I hope this group continues so more people
can be helped as I have been. Joyce is such a caring person
and she makes you feel great about yourself. It was good therapy
to be able to talk out a lot of problems I have had for years.
Thanks for the opportunity."
Although the group has ended, the women are continuing to
meet together once a month for support. Two of the women have
joined a "Begin Again" support group in the community,
one went on to work at Cythera's thrift shop as a volunteer,
and three others have joined the "Begin Again" group
on outings to Whistler and Victoria.
Further funding is being applied for to enable a second support
group to be established in the Maple Ridge-Pitt Meadows area.
In September, the Victoria xxxx met with the "Milestones
to Happiness" program partners to review the program's
success and apply for funding to start up a similar group
in the Victoria area. BCCEAS will be writing up a manual at
a later date to assist other community groups, transition
houses and seniors' organizations which might wish to consider
establishing such a group.
Although there are support groups for battered women around
the province, the older woman's experiences - the different
values and culture that she grew up in, and what she sees
as her choices - are very different from those of younger
women. As the success of this program has demonstrated, there
is a very definite need for support groups for older abused
women (and for older abused men) which address their unique
experiences and requirements.
-Carol Ward-Hall
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